Momfessions

Honestly I don’t know how those women do it.  You know the ones I’m talking about– they blog about making blueberry muffins from scratch while their handful of children work independently on home school assignments.  They grow their own veggies and herbs, and welcome their husband home each night with fresh make-up on and a delicious home-cooked meal in the oven.  They’re sexy, and wise, and creative, and cool.  They never raise their voices at their children, and their husbands feel like the most cherished man in the world.  They make money from ads on their blogs from awesome companies, and they are writing a book in their free time…

Oh wait. No one’s really like all that, you say?

Funny, ’cause somehow that’s exactly how I expect ME to be. And for some odd reason I’ve tricked my mind into thinking all those other women out there are doing it.  And doing it without much effort.

Let me tell you something about me:

  • I’m 22 weeks pregnant and I drink Starbucks and Pepsi whenever I can.  I have to.
  • I snuggle and read bedtime stories to my children like the perfect mother, but will yell in a heartbeat when they get out of bed asking for a (insert bedtime request here).  It’s like I lose all patience after magical story-time ends.
  • I like cooking boxed macaroni and cheese for my kids when it’s just us for lunch.  And I like eating it too.  I have never looked at the sodium per serving, and probably never will.
  • I’m frightened about having my third child because I don’t feel like a good enough mom.  I am not sure how everyone will cross the street when there are three times as many of them as there are of me.  And I will soon be lacking a 1-to-1 ratio on arms to children.
  • Sometimes (like now) I sit in the middle of a trashed living room and instead of picking up the dirty laundry, pillow forts, sippy cups, and toys, I sit in the middle of it all to check Twitter and Facebook because I can.  And selfishly, I want to.

I’m not sure why I’m telling you all of this.  Maybe I just needed to get it off my chest.  I’m not the perfect woman, and I don’t think I mind all that much.

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14 thoughts on “Momfessions

  1. 🙂 I’m struggling with yelling lately too. Every passing year requires me to depend on Him more, cause my own “strength” just isn’t enough anymore. It’s a good thing He strips us of our abilities to be enough, to “have it all together”… and when you’re overseas, it can feel even more so. Cause then He carries us along and shows us grace in our weakness… and He shines all the more clear.

    As for going past the 1-to-1 ratio thing, a sling and a stroller help me… and also being fierce about them holding onto the side of a stroller.

    No one is perfect… but I totally understand the feeling that everyone else is. Don’t listen to it. Just keep “doing the next thing” and listen to Him. (I had a similar post one day when I’d had enough of reading of other people’s perfection– called “My seven-month-old ate dirt (and other confessions)”: http://makinghome.blogspot.com/2008/11/my-seven-month-old-ate-dirt-and-other.html

    It came to mind when I read your post. 🙂

    Blessings to you…

  2. I could have written this myself…word for word! I’m laughing and crying – and so thankful that I’m not the only one that thinks those things….and does those things!

    I was talking with my doula yesterday and I was telling her I felt like such a slacker as the kids were camped out in front of the tv while I was struggling through a rough afternoon of braxton-hicks contractions. She said, “That’s fine – it won’t hurt them…but a pregnant mama will!” LOL…So, I grabbed a blanket and some pillows and we all camped out on the floor 😉

    ((hugs)) Enjoy that pepsi 😉

  3. You know what’s funny? I feel like you are one of the moms who DOES have it all together. haha So maybe you’re doing better than you think. 🙂

    I started feeling inadequate the moment Xander was born. They handed him to me, him screaming of course, and I instantly had no idea how to soothe him. Lately, though, I’m realizing that it’s okay if he doesn’t have a portion of every food group with every meal – as long as he’s eating. (And it’s not like I give him a bowl of M&Ms for lunch or anything.) And it’s okay if he throws a fit in the grocery store and I have to discipline him right then and there. Other moms understand. And the other people….well, I don’t care if they understand or not. haha He is very loved, and he knows and feels that.

    And yes, as I type this there is one sippy cup, two Shrek toys, a stuffed bumblebee, three balls, and a large firetruck sitting on my living room floor. 🙂

  4. As I’ve been reminded….
    God made you the perfect mother for your kids!!
    Enjoy your Starbucks and Pepsi!!
    We love you!!

  5. I think you’re amazing… And pretty much always have. You DO seem like you are on top of everything! And you most certainly inspire me!! Enjoy that cup of Starbucks!

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