Free-Write Friday {5}

I feel my voice raising and it seems I am outside my own body as I watch me yell at my kids…

I weep over spilled salsa on the freshly mopped kitchen floor and the stress and frustration of a hard week pour from my eyes…

I feel biting words leaving my mouth directed at my best friend and husband, and wonder why I chose to speak at all…

I feel like Eustache, the boy-turned-dragon, (a figment of CS Lewis’ divinely creative imagination) a disgusting creature with need for change

I yearn for the holy claws to peel off my nasty scales and make me whole again

“Then the lion said – but I don’t know if it spoke – You will have to let me undress you. I was afraid of his claws, I can tell you, but I was pretty nearly desperate now. So I just lay flat down on my back to let him do it.

“The very first tear he made was so deep that I thought it had gone right into my heart. And when he began pulling the skin off, it hurt worse than anything I’ve ever felt. The only thing that made me able to bear it was just the pleasure of feeling the stuff peel off. You know – if you’ve ever picked the scab off a sore place. It hurts like billy-oh but it is such fun to see it coming away.”

“Well, he peeled the beastly stuff right off …and there it was lying on the grass…. And there was I as smooth and soft as a peeled switch and smaller than I had been. Then he caught hold of me – I didn’t like that much for I was very tender underneath now that I’d no skin on – and threw me into the water. It smarted like anything but only for a moment. After that it became perfectly delicious and as soon as I started swimming and splashing I found that all the pain had gone from my arm. And then I saw why. I’d turned into a boy again.”

{The Voyage of the Dawn Treader}

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